Amtrekker
Hey Team,
I’m an unemployed vagrant. All I have is a backpack full of technology, a shoestring budget and a very important list. When everything is crossed off my list I get to go home! Let me know if you want to trade one of those shoestrings for help. brett@amtrekker.com
See where Amtrekker's been for the last 505 days.
See where Amtrekker's been for the last 505 days.

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  1. Tube down a river
  2. Ride a horse through a covered bridge
  3. Sleep in a lighthouse
  4. Learn survival skills
  5. Enter a hot dog eating contest
  6. Walk to the top of the Empire State Building
  7. See a live taping of The Colbert Report
  8. See a game at Fenway Park
  9. Milk a cow on an Amish farm
  10. Wade through a cranberry bog
  11. Go into a coal mine
  12. Take part in a Civil War reenactment
  13. Race dirt bikes
  14. Make Moonshine
  15. Hitchhike
  16. Learn to Sail
  17. Try my hand at kiteboarding
  18. Pet a sloth
  19. Help out on a plantation
  20. Learn to run a 3 card monte game
  21. Tell Donald Trump "You're Fired."
  22. Be a guest on a talk show
  23. Hang gliding
  24. Be part of a stage illusion
  25. Be in a movie
  26. Experience Comic Con
  27. Go on a lobster boat
  28. SCUBA dive in the Atlantic
  29. Drive a race car
  30. Go to an obscure small town festival
  31. River kayak
  32. Geocache in all 48 contiguous states
    Profile for Amtrekker
  33. Collect honey from a beehive
  34. Scale the lowest highest point in a state
  35. Arkansas Crater of diamonds state park and look for a diamond
  36. Ride the fastest roller coaster in the country
  37. Go through a hedge maze
  38. Catch a firefly
  39. Motorcycle Rally
  40. Ride a cow
  41. Sandboarding
  42. Ride an ostrich
  43. Create a crop circle
  44. Fly fishing
  45. Swamp boat ride with gators
  46. See a movie at the Alamo Draft House
  47. Tour the Crayola Factory
  48. Ben and Jerry's Flavor Graveyard
  49. See a Freak Show
  50. Hike to the bottom of the Grand Canyon


Wholesale Slaughter:

Hey Team,

I rode the motorcycle up to Northern California yesterday to meet with a couple of friends I haven’t seen in a very long time. It seemed like a simple enough procedure and in many ways it was…it just wasn’t a very comfortable ride.

Butterfly swarm

Turns out this is also butterfly mating season here in California and along the scenic (and not so scenic) highways butterflies are chasing each other around at high speeds and following unpredictable paths like a bunch of drunken, horny high school seniors after prom night. Except now picture thousands upon thousands of prom nighters all bouncing off my windshield and helmet. (Wait…that analogy broke down somewhere.)

SPLAT!

The point is: I was LITERALLY dodging butterflies as I was riding the bike. Bobbing and weaving my head trying not to catch a bug to the face mask that would obstruct my vision and the whole time thinking about that board game “SPLAT!” (I know you know what I’m talking about. It’s like Sorry! but with the added fun of crushing each other’s bug shaped play-dough playing pieces.)

The worst part is that the windshields on motorcycles are only so big. As a result every cute little butterfly that bounces off is like a water balloon bursting on contact and showering the poor rider (me) with a thin film of…whatever that butterfly had for lunch.

Butterfly Roadkill

I stepped off the bike in Modesto feeling like a jerk for the wholesale slaughter I enacted on the butterfly community but simultaneously kind of irritated by the gut bath I was forced to endure. Of course, once I realized how irritated I was by the inconvenience the deaths of thousands caused me I felt even worse. Sometimes I think life would be much easier if I weren’t such a sissy.






I’m done.

Brett.





And here are two great ways to help out Team Amtrekker! Our new affiliation with bookingbuddy.com means all you have to do to help out the site is click on one of their ads and sign up for an awesome newsletter filled with travel deals! Thanks everyone!


Thanks!

This entry was posted on Friday, August 22nd, 2008 at 1:15 pm.

2 Comments »

  1. Want to replace the lost PETA sponserships? Donate Above, and don’t be shy about it, you tree hugging hippy sissies!

    Comment by just ilott — August 22, 2008 @ 3:39 pm

  2. @just ilott: That’s the spirit!

    Comment by Brett — August 29, 2008 @ 2:44 am

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