Amtrekker
Hey Team,
I’m an unemployed vagrant. All I have is a backpack full of technology, a shoestring budget and a very important list. When everything is crossed off my list I get to go home! Let me know if you want to trade one of those shoestrings for help. brett@amtrekker.com
See where
Amtrekker's been for the last 366 days.
See where Amtrekker's been for the last 366 days.

  1. Tube down a river
  2. Ride a horse through a covered bridge
  3. Sleep in a lighthouse
  4. Learn survival skills
  5. Enter a hot dog eating contest
  6. Walk to the top of the Empire State Building
  7. See a live taping of The Colbert Report
  8. See a game at Fenway Park
  9. Milk a cow on an Amish farm
  10. Wade through a cranberry bog
  11. Go into a coal mine
  12. Take part in a Civil War reenactment
  13. Race dirt bikes
  14. Make Moonshine
  15. Hitchhike
  16. Learn to Sail
  17. Try my hand at kiteboarding
  18. Pet a sloth
  19. Help out on a plantation
  20. Learn to run a 3 card monte game
  21. Tell Donald Trump "You're Fired."
  22. Be a guest on a talk show
  23. Hang gliding
  24. Be part of a stage illusion
  25. Be in a movie
  26. Experience Comic Con
  27. Go on a lobster boat
  28. Scuba dive in the Atlantic
  29. Drive a race car
  30. Go to an obscure small town festival
  31. River kayak
  32. Geocache in all 48 contiguous states
    Profile for Amtrekker
  33. Collect honey from a beehive
  34. Scale the lowest highest point in a state
  35. Arkansas Crater of diamonds state park and look for a diamond
  36. Ride the fastest roller coaster in the country
  37. Go through a hedge maze
  38. Catch a firefly
  39. Motorcycle Rally
  40. Ride a cow
  41. Sandboarding
  42. Ride an ostrich
  43. Create a crop circle
  44. Fly fishing
  45. Swamp boat ride with gators
  46. See a movie at the Alamo Draft House
  47. Tour the Crayola Factory
  48. Ben and Jerry's Flavor Graveyard
  49. See a Freak Show
  50. Hike to the bottom of the Grand Canyon


Mega-Bust:

Hey Team,

Why don’t you just go ahead and tuck yourself in and I’ll tell you a little bedtime story.

If you’re trying to get to Los Angeles from San Francisco the SMART thing to do would be to buy a bus or train ticket, show up on time and roll out Autobot style. For some reason, in Brettville, it makes just as much sense to NOT buy a ticket and rush to the bus station in the blind hope that you’ll show up on time.

Yesterday. The facts as I had them:

1. I hadn’t packed my bag - 30 min.

2. I still had to get to the bus station - 90 min

3. It was coming up on 9:30.

4. The last bus to LA leaves at 11:30.

5. I still hadn’t bought a ticket.

No big deal. I leapt into action with all the grace of a sleep deprived vagrant and threw my gear into the backpack, sprinting (metaphorically) for the BART station. This was the part where I was supposed to be stressed out, checking the time repeatedly and willing the train to go faster. Unfortunately, due to an unusual childhood, I tend to get distracted and forget to be stressed so instead I just read “Franny and Zooey” by J.D. Salinger.

It wasn’t until I got off the BART that I looked at the clock and actually started to get worried. I still had about a mile to walk and a ticket to buy with only ten minutes to spare before the bus was scheduled to pull out.

megabus

I made it to the station just in time to see the giant blue bus pull in with the “Megabus” logo plastered across the side. Travelers lined up at the door and the driver stepped out.

“Hi, I still haven’t bought my ticket. Can I just pay you in cash?”

“Nope. You have to have a confirmation number.”

“Well, if I give you cash can you give me a confirmation number?”

“Nope. Drivers can’t take payment for a ticket.”

“Okay…here’s the thing: I need to get to LA. I obviously can’t buy a ticket but you have extra seats and I have cash. What can we make happen?”

Without even bothering to look up and in a tone of voice that, if possible, was actually NEGATIVE sympathetic (like a giant sympathy sucking black hole that actually makes the people around him just as unsympathetic), “Nothing.”

“Fine,” I thought. “I’m not one to give up and I still have a couple tricks up my sleeve. Let’s do this Charley.”

With only a few minutes to spare I jumped on the interwebs to buy a ticket online and get the ever-precious confirmation number. I quickly ran into two problems. 1. I didn’t have enough money on my card to cover the ticket and 2. It didn’t matter anyway. They had already closed the sales for that bus.

Sometimes I suck at this game.

On the upside, I’m sitting in a car instead of a bus right now on my way down to LA courtesy of a craigslist rideshare. Cozier, cheaper AND I get to help save the planet.

KatKelly

I’m done.

Brett.





If you like what you read you could always help pay for that next bus ticket! ;)


Don’t let me stop you.


2 Comments »

  1. Another reason I’m convinced Megabus is the worst bus company ever. I took it from Detroit to Chicago last year, and on the day we were supposed to return, they did not come back. They cancelled all trips that day and didn’t bother to notify us. Thank god for the youth hostel since we didn’t have any lodgings for the night.

    Comment by missannw — May 10, 2008 @ 3:37 pm

  2. What the french, toast?
    I have a saying about buses. Now’s when you’d expect to read aforementioned saying, but no. Not here. Not like this. It may be that I am bored at work while everyone kicks off the first official frisbee game of the season on the nicest day of the year that has me vexed and bitter, or it may be my schadenfreude proclivity and want all to be stuck inside and miserable about it on this glorious, gorgeous spring day. Buses:Brett = Missing Frisbee:Ilott = ;( frowny face.
    Pffsh. Buses…

    Comment by ilott the douchebag — May 11, 2008 @ 10:57 am

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