Is Horse Feed Really a Good Idea Anyway?

Is Horse Feed Really a Good Idea Anyway?

Hey Team,

I’ve been reading quite a bit about moonshine lately since I’ve recently decided I don’t want to poison myself like so many ill-advised hillbillies before me. As a result I felt pretty confident when I set out this afternoon to hunt down some grain for the “mash” to start the fermentation process. A quick half hour to and from the Tack and Feed store and I’d be set. Easy.

Here’s the thing. Nothing is ever easy in my world. (Of course I wouldn’t have it any other way. Where would the fun be in that? And where would I get all these ridiculous stories from?!)

When it comes right down to it, even after HOURS of researching moonshine making techniques and recipes, all I really knew was that the recipe I had decided to use (because it looked simple) recommended a five gallon bucket of “MannaPro Hi Grain sweet feed.”

I have no idea what that means.

“Hi. Do you guys sell, MannaPro Hi Grain sweet feed?”

“What’s that?”

“I thought you were suppose to take it from there. I don’t even know what the words I just said mean…I’m just on an errand for my aunt.” Ha! That’ll throw them off the scent. Now they’ll never know I’m secretly trying to make moonshine! (I’m ashamed to admit, that is painfully close to what I was actually thinking when I said that.)

“Let me ask around.” She disappeared behind a door to talk to some sort of federal agent that knew “MannaPro Hi Grain sweet feed” was the preferred grain of moonshiners. (I’d been watching way too much “Burn Notice.”)

“Nope, sorry. We don’t have that.”

“Do you have any other ‘all grain horse feeds?'” I parroted the only other piece of information I could remember from the recipe.

“Blah blah blah gibberish nonsense.” She explained.

“Oh.” I blinked. “Thanks. I’ll just try somewhere else.”

I called around and was shot down by three other feed stores before finally deciding I needed to try a new tactic. After jumping back on Charley I found that an easy substitute for the horse feed would be corn meal. Easy.

I stopped at the nearest supermarket and took a stroll down the “baking needs” aisle. There was a box marked corn meal for about $4 that was only about a third of what I needed or several bags marked Harina Masa that as near as I could tell basically translated to “corn flour” and had as much mass as I would require for a doable $1.50! But not knowing if they would be interchangeable and terrified I was going to kill myself with this concoction I continued to stare at my options for another ten minutes before finally eliciting help from the internets.

Armed with newfound knowledge from multiple sources I stared for another ten minutes before getting flustered and leaving empty handed.

But NOW. Now, I have everything I need to start the fermentation process! Tomorrow is the big day…kind of.

It’s the day Moonshinery 2008 begins and I start the process that could easily be screwed up at any one of a number of junctures resulting in failure.

Wish me luck.

I’m done.


And here are two great ways to help out Team Amtrekker! Thanks everyone!


6 Replies to “Is Horse Feed Really a Good Idea Anyway?”

  1. Really now. You could have just called and asked. My Mother’s family made moonshine for generations. I could have steered you in the right direction.

    Most Hillbillies killed themselves because they were using equipment which contained lead or other heavy metals. That, or the still blew up. If I were you I’d be more worried about the still blowing up.

  2. from what i read on wikipedia it seeemed as though explosions were the dangerous part too….? EXPLOSIONS!! you must have read that somewhere right?? you and your research!?

  3. If only you had come really good friends that regularly make their own alcohol. Do you have any experienced help there amtrekker. I can tell you the #1 rule, keep it clean. Once the heat drops below boiling, treat that stuff like high grade stem cell embryos. For God sake don’t go sneezing and dropping skin cells in there you dirty fool!
    Love Mike

  4. Just make sure to leave the bottle open for a bit the first time you open it before you drink. That will allow the more volatile Methanol to evaporate off if it’s in there, leaving behind only sweet sweet ethanol to be enjoyed. Methanol is converted inside your body into formaldehyde and concentrates in your optic nerve causing blindness. And you don’t want that ‘trekker, nobody does.

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