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Ins-N-Outs of Providence

Hey Team,

I started my day wandering the streets of Providence, RI without direction. I had a map…but my inadequacies towards directions rendered it fundamentally ineffective. (That sounded kind of hoity-toity…let’s just say I suck at trying to get places.) So, next thing I knew I was in what can only be described as the slums of Providence as I passed one adult movie store after another. My impressions of Rhode Island were definitely spiraling downward and despite my usual tendency to avoid backtracking at all costs I decided to head back the way I had come, towards the only civilization I knew existed.

Once I was back in the “heart” of Providence I started making my way to the nearest geocache to knock out another 1/48th of an objective. On my way I realized my map had fallen out of my back pocket. Despite the fact that it was completely useless in my hands I still felt the need to go back. (I’m prone to extreme guilt when it comes to littering…save the planet, people!)

I made an abrupt about face and for the second time in a day started heading back the way I had come.

“That was a quick turn around,” More >

Amtrak Mathamagicians

Hey Team,

I just renewed my North American Rail Pass and jumped on a train bound for the tiny state of Rhode Island and it occurred to me that even though I’ve been traveling almost entirely by train I’ve yet to talk about those crazy kids at Amtrak.

Let me just start off by saying, “I love traveling by rail.” There. Done. Over with.

Now let me say, “You have to be a freakin’ mathamagician to figure out how they come up with their menu prices!”

Take a look at this handy little snapshot of their drink prices.

If you take a close look you’ll notice that:

1. It costs negative $0.25 to carbonate and put syrup in water. (Soda = $1.25; Bottled Water = $1.50!)

AND

2. There’s an 80% discount on water if you’re willing to let it cool down. (Hot Water = $0.25; Bottled Water = $1.50! Still!) So the energy loss in heating up water costs an additional negative $1.25?!

My brain hurts.

I have a couple more things to say about Amtrak food service. First of all it should be a federal offense to serve a Girl Scout troop Frapachinos and Red Bulls. I HATE horror movies and it’s like watching a low budget Grudge More >

Pre-sliced American Cheese

Hey Team,

I’m on a train on the way to New York right now. Eventually, after sitting in an airport for hours on end I’ll be on my way to Sacramento to see my Best Friend get married. Needless to say it’s giving me a lot of downtime to think. And the way said thoughts are rolling around expect this story to be both cheesy and rambling…however, I AM easily distracted so for all I know I’ll get six lines in and start talking about some shiny object I saw.

Speaking of shiny objects, the family across the aisle from me has a MacBook Pro also…except it’s newer than Charley. I hope he doesn’t get jealous. I don’t know that you could actually call it SHINIER than Charley but…hmm…I forgot what I was going to write about.

[reboot]

As a result of using Boston as an impromptu base of operations over the last week, making several trips out and back, I made quite a few friends in “The Walking City.” And I have to say; it made it surprisingly difficult to leave. Although I didn’t “technically” know any of these people for very long they were still so generous and kind that it literally More >

Security Resistant Terrorists

Lat: N 39 56.552 Long: W 075 08.728

Hey Team,

I’m soaking wet and going on my thirty-fifth hour without sleep right now. So far everything is going EXACTLY as expected. Honestly, I had a great time today and I’ll try to have a run down of my Philadelphia experience up tomorrow sometime. Tonight you kids are the privileged few who get to experience my newest airport rant! And I’m really sorry the really for real amtrekker.com site isn’t up yet. I promise it’s someone else’s fault.

Okay, suppose you want to travel by jet somewhere AND you want to bring toothpaste, deodorant and contact lens solution. Tough. TSA says no. And they don’t leave you a lot of wiggle room. You can’t have any container bigger than 3 ounces and all of your containers have to fit in a clear zip-top sandwich bag. By itself I suppose that’s not terrible. But don’t forget to take off your shoes. OH! And make sure your laptop is out of it’s case…whoops don’t forget the camcorder too! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!!

“No, now please empty your pockets.” Things are getting WAY out of hand with airport security. And here’s my new scary theory.

Are we REALLY More >


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