Amtrekker

Hey Team,

Okay! No more of that silly waiting for Brett to do his thing. Here it is! Let me know what you think!

“Amtrekker travels to Caruthers, CA for the Caruthers Nationals flattrack dirtbike races where he manages to (of course) crash multiply times and show the crowd why people should never get on a bike for the first time for a race.”

The chat is for tonight and the comments are for posterity. (You can sign on using Facebook Connect AND you can leave VIDEO comments now! How cool is that, right?)

Thanks Team!

I’m excited.

Brett.

If you like the site, it’s still your help that keeps things going! Thanks a ton, everyone!

Hey Team,

Here’s the fun stuff!

“Amtrekker and Dr. Tiki travel into international waters under cover of night to show you how to distill moonshine.

Mistakes are made…not the least of which are actually tasting the booze.

(Part two of a two part series! Part one is right here.)”

Follow Amtrekker, Dr. Tiki and TikiTosca on twitter.

Subscribe to Amtrekker on iTunes!

And here’s the YouTube link.

Thanks Team!

I’m done.

Brett.

Just for the record. Bookingbuddy really is a pretty rad website if you’re looking to plan a trip. It actually allows you to search most of the top website from one location. Pretty handy! But more importantly…our new affiliation with bookingbuddy.com means all you have to do to help out Amtrekker is click on one of their ads and sign up for an awesome newsletter filled with travel deals! Thanks everyone!

Thanks!

Hey Team,

I decided to release the Moonshining with Dr. Tiki video in two parts (it will be a few weeks before part 2 rears it’s ugly head thanks to the fermentation process). So, here it is!

“Amtrekker travels to international waters to meet with the famed Dr. Tiki for some moonshining hijinks!

Uncertainty ensues.”

And here’s the YouTube link

I’m done.

Brett.

Annnddd…here are two great ways to help out Team Amtrekker! Our new affiliation with bookingbuddy.com means all you have to do to help out the site is click on one of their ads and sign up for an awesome newsletter filled with travel deals! Thanks everyone!

Thanks!

Hey Team,

Not that I’m not known for making bad decisions (who doesn’t love double negatives) but I’ve had better ideas than allowing the first time I’ve ever so much as sat down on a dirt bike to be the practice lap for a dirt bike race. Seriously. What was I thinking?

I can only tell you what was going through my mind after I had made my decision and I sat on the bike in a line of dozens of other riders all waiting for their turns at the track. (Everyone gets the opportunity to take a few laps before the races to get a feel for the dirt and the nuances of the track. Unfortunately for me…I got those same few laps to learn how to ride a dirt bike.)

“Well, at least this bike can’t kick me to death if I piss it off,” I thought aloud as I looked down to see if the bruise from the ostrich-racing escapade had healed yet. But as I looked down I saw the bike next to me and thought about how unforgiving that knobby-wheeled little machine must be when it runs you over after you fall on turn one like an amateur (or an amtrekker).

Then I started to think, “Wait, if that thing is going to run me over then that means I was in front! That’s a win-win. Either I’m losing and I don’t get run over or I’m winning at the expense of tread marks across my face!” (Obviously, it’s pretty easy for me to talk myself into doing stupid things.)

I kick started the bike and revved the throttle, motioning to my cousin Lisa (who would be one of only two people I would be racing against later) giving her the “going down” threat…right after pointing at myself.

Finally our turn to hit the track came and without hesitating I shot out into the dirt flat track and instantly realized how unprepared I was. I spent the next several minutes of my life getting lapped by kids I could pick up and toss over the chain link fence without much effort but could never hope to beat in a race around an oval track.

Thoroughly disappointed in myself I sought out friends and family for advice and was basically told that it takes practice, much more practice than I’ve had.

I regained a little sparkle of hope when I saw that there were only four racers, including myself, scheduled for my class. I felt better still when one of those racers (the only one I didn’t know) dropped out. It meant I would at least come away with third place in the first heat.

Barely. Yep, after a mediocre start, terrible technical skills and a crash in turn one of lap four I almost succeeded in getting fourth place out of three.

When the main event came around Lisa’s tire had come down with an irreparable flat thanks to a gaping hole in her tire roughly the width of my switchblade. Unfortunately, Kenny never left his bike unguarded and I was forced to find a more creative way to beat him. I tried blackmail and bribery but without any money to my name both were destined for failure.

With a spark of inspiration I dove into the race with more poor technical skills and another crash (this time in turn four of lap four) but even that wasn’t enough to win the day! I was forced to settle for second place.

But let me just end on this slightly depressing note. I was CRAZY frustrated with myself. I would MUCH rather get 49th place out of 50 than 2nd out of two. Man, do I ever hate losing.

Regardless, thanks so much to APF Motorcycle Salvage and the folks who put on the Caruthers Nationals for helping me find out how much more practice I’m going to need to just to move up to “sucks” on the “How good am I on a dirtbike scale?” I’ll get some pictures up when I have a chance to pull them off my video camera!

I’m done.

Brett.

Just for the record. Bookingbuddy really is a pretty rad website if you’re looking to plan a trip. It actually allows you to search most of the top travel ticketing websites from one location. Pretty handy! But more importantly…our new affiliation with bookingbuddy.com means all you have to do to help out Amtrekker is click on one of their ads and sign up for an awesome newsletter filled with travel deals! Thanks everyone!

Thanks!

Hey Team,

Here’s the update on “Moonshinery 2008.” You all know Jeff MacPherson (better known on the webbernets as Dr. Tiki) and I got the ball rolling late last week with an attempt at mash (which, for you non-hillbillies out there is the fermented liquid that gets distilled into moonshine). As far as we know (which isn’t very far) things went well…

Yesterday I got a call from Dr. Tiki saying that, after five days, our (more than likely poisonous) mixture of sugar, cornmeal and yeast definitely smelled like booze…and bread. And since I have to be in Virginia City tomorrow to ride an ostrich(!) we decided to jump the gun a little and see if we couldn’t manage to distill some grade A moonshine from what had already fermented.

We couldn’t.

Despite our ingenious still setup we had nothing to show for our early efforts after several hours. Which isn’t to say we’ve failed…yet. The yeast in our toxic brew is still doing it’s thing and as soon as that poison stops bubbling and things start smelling more like alcohol than bread we’ll jump back in and see what we can make happen!

Until then…I’m going to go jump head first into the terrifying world of ostrich racing! Wish me luck!

I’m done.

Brett.

Just for the record. Bookingbuddy really is a pretty rad website if you’re looking to plan a trip. It actually allows you to search most of the top website from one location. Pretty handy! But more importantly…our new affiliation with bookingbuddy.com means all you have to do to help out Amtrekker is click on one of their ads and sign up for an awesome newsletter filled with travel deals! Thanks everyone!

Thanks!

Hey Team,

I’ve been reading quite a bit about moonshine lately since I’ve recently decided I don’t want to poison myself like so many ill-advised hillbillies before me. As a result I felt pretty confident when I set out this afternoon to hunt down some grain for the “mash” to start the fermentation process. A quick half hour to and from the Tack and Feed store and I’d be set. Easy.

Here’s the thing. Nothing is every easy in my world. (Of course I wouldn’t have it any other way. Where would the fun be in that? And where would I get all these ridiculous stories from?!)

When it comes right down to it, even after HOURS of researching moonshine making techniques and recipes, all I really new was that the recipe I had decided to use (because it looked simple) recommended a five gallon bucket of “MannaPro Hi Grain sweet feed.”

I have no idea what that means.

“Hi. Do you guys sell, MannaPro Hi Grain sweet feed?”

“What’s that?”

“I thought you were suppose to take it from there. I don’t even know what the words I just said mean…I’m just on an errand for my aunt.” Ha! That’ll throw them off the scent. Now they’ll never know I’m secretly trying to make moonshine! (I’m ashamed to admit that is painfully close to what I was actually thinking when I said that.)

“Let me ask around.” She disappeared behind a door to talk to some sort of federal agent that knew “MannaPro Hi Grain sweet feed” was the preferred grain of moonshiners. (I’d been watching way too much “Burn Notice.”)

“Nope, sorry. We don’t have that.”

“Do you have any other ‘all grain horse feeds?’” I parroted the only other piece of information I could remember from the recipe.

“Blah blah blah gibberish nonsense.” She explained.

“Oh.” I blinked. “Thanks. I’ll just try somewhere else.”

I called around and was shot down by three other feed stores before finally deciding I needed to take a new tactic. After jumping back on Charley I found that an easy substitute for the horse feed would be corn meal. Easy.

I stopped at the nearest supermarket and took a stroll down the “baking needs” aisle. There was a box marked corn meal for about $4 that was only about a third of what I needed or several bags marked Harina Masa that as near as I could tell basically translated to “corn flour” and had as much mass as I would require for a doable $1.50! But not knowing if they would be interchangeable and terrified I was going to kill myself with this concoction I continued to stare at my options for another ten minutes before finally eliciting help from the internets.

Armed with newfound knowledge from multiple sources I stared for another ten minutes before getting flustered and leaving empty handed.

But NOW. Now, I have everything I need to start the fermentation process! Tomorrow is the big day…kind of.

It’s the day Moonshinery 2008 begins and I start the process that could easily be screwed up at any one of a number of junctures resulting in failure.

Wish me luck.

I’m done.

Brett.

And here are two great ways to help out Team Amtrekker! Our new affiliation with bookingbuddy.com means all you have to do to help out the site is click on one of their ads and sign up for an awesome newsletter filled with travel deals! Thanks everyone!

Thanks!